Your Pet Is Basically a Furry Investment Portfolio
Let’s talk about your pets. Or as I like to call mine: a four-legged money pit. According to a new study, owning a dog or cat in 2025 now costs…
Support, care or happy family, men and kids bonding with foster puppy or pet and enjoying time together. High quality photo
Let’s talk about your pets. Or as I like to call mine: a four-legged money pit.
According to a new study, owning a dog or cat in 2025 now costs at least $20,000 over their lifetime. TWENTY. THOUSAND. DOLLARS. That’s not a typo. That’s a down payment. On a house. Or a pretty decent used car. Or, you know, half a Taylor Swift ticket.
But sure, let’s talk about your pet.
People think owning a cat costs about $5,700 over 15 years. Cute. Like a cat playing with a dead mouse. The reality? Cats will cost you anywhere from $20K to $47K. Dogs? $22K to $61K. Because apparently unconditional love comes with conditional overdraft fees.
Speaking of which: allow me to introduce Poor Dead Norman, my beagle-basset mix who needed Prozac just to handle the crushing burden of suburban ennui. Prozac. For dogs. Guess who didn’t budget for that? Me. Also guess who paid for it anyway? Still me.
Then there was Molly. A Black Lab with the digestive system of a garbage disposal. Molly had a refined palate — only the finest cotton socks, straight from the laundry basket. She racked up over $4,000 in emergency sock-removal surgeries. That's not an exaggeration. That’s receipts and a payment plan.
Fun fact: Molly inspired Fat Louis, the sock-eating cat in The Princess Diaries. True story. You’re welcome, Anne Hathaway.
So no, I wasn’t shocked by this new report. I’ve lived it. Pet food? Expensive. Pet insurance? A joke. Toys? Destroyed in 7 minutes. Vet visits? Mortgage-worthy. But here's the kicker — I’d do it again. Because I’m a sucker. And because Molly once brought me a slipper and looked so proud I cried.
Look, I’m not saying don’t get a pet. I’m just saying: get a spreadsheet. Budget like you’re adopting a toddler who licks their butt and eats bees.
Because when the next vet bill hits, and you’re holding a dog in a surgical cone and a receipt for $1,200 marked “foreign object retrieval” — just remember: they’re not just a pet. They’re family. Really expensive, emotionally manipulative, adorable family.
And they’re worth every penny.
(But seriously, hide your socks.)
