40% of Families Have Holiday Fights: Main Topics to Avoid

The holidays coming up means lots of family fights. Which sounds like a cliché for a Hallmark movie script where opposing views are met at the Thanksgiving tables. What is it about this holiday that brings out the best and the worst in us? Is it because we don’t spend as much time with family as we used to?

Family get-togethers should be a joyous time, filled with laughter, shared memories and creating new ones with our loved ones. Inevitably, some of these gatherings can become heated when we have strong opinions and strong personalities all gathered around the table.

A poll found 40% of families deal with "open disagreements" around the holidays.  And that's without factoring in the election.

Politics is the #1 topic that can start a fight, but it didn't win by much.  Here are the top three:

1.  Politics.  34% of people said it's a frequent point of tension in their family. We can all agree that the presidential election of 2024 was a divisive one. No matter who you wanted to win, you have to admit half the country is probably not that happy with the results.

2.  Family dynamics and past grievances, 32%.  So, ongoing stuff that's been brewing, then bubbles over. If there is some tension that has been on the back burner, unfortunately, it could bubble up over Thanksgiving dinner. Best to take your grievances elsewhere and at another time.

3.  A tie between relationships and finances, both 25%.  Try to avoid phrases like, "That wife of yours is why you don't have any money." This is a no, no at the dinner table, there’s no need to discuss either at the table, especially if you have an issue with somebody over one of them.

Arguing about those things is usually pointless.  But here's another reason to avoid them.  There's a one in three chance it becomes a WAR.

The poll found a third of holiday fights end up escalating into "lasting rifts" that can impact relationships for years. 

Ahh, home for the holidays with the entire family. What could possibly go wrong? We have come to expect certain things at these special times. Things like the weirdness and dysfunctionality will always fly in these situations. All we can do is accept and embrace. Oh...and of course find an escape. Here's your escape route. These are 7 of the best Thanksgiving movies to watch after your big meal, and help quiet things down or enliven them, if that's what your family needs.

Sure, it's a holiday about giving thanks. It's also a holiday to reflect, reminisce and be grateful. Sometimes, it's just about sitting together in the same room, no words necessary. Movie watching is the perfect activity for everyone. Of course, not everyone will agree on one movie. However,  if you present this list of 7 of the best Thanksgiving movies to watch after your big meal, there will likely be at least one you can agree on.

With some assistance from Rotten Tomatoes and Wikipedia I've compiled a list that presents options for everyone. And the options range from quintessential sentimental flicks to very non-traditional options. In the end, they are all movies about families, friends and our connections. With families comes plenty of drama, comedy. love and dislike.

Here, you will find films that focus on the positive, like Planes, Trains and Automobiles. There's a family-friendly classic Peanuts favorite included, as well as one that steers off the Thanksgiving path some, but is definitely family focused, in the movie Knives-Out.

I've seen most of these great pieces of entertainment, and a little of some of them. But, I am definitely going to revisit a few of these over my visit back home to see my parents. I love turning my kids on to some of the older ones, like The Big Chill. Take a look at the list, revisit for yourself and throw the names out at your holiday get-together. What other Thanksgiving related movies would you add to this list?

1973

You are never too old to enjoy Peanuts.

This Thanksgiving nugget features our favorite Peanuts, like Charlie Brown to Linus, Snoopy, Lucy, Peppermint Patty, and the rest of the gang. In case you forgot the scenario, Peppermint Patty invites everyone to Charlie Brown’s for Thanksgiving, Charlie can barely make cereal, so his trusty old pal Snoopy steps in to save the day and enlists the help of his friends to save Thanksgiving for Charlie and his buddies.

1995

Starring: Holly Hunter, Robert Downey Jr., Anne Bancroft, Charles Durning, Dylan McDermott, Geraldine Chaplin, Steve Guttenberg, Cynthia Stevenson, Claire Danes, Austin Pendleton, and David Strathairn.

Jodie Foster directed this stellar ensemble cast for a movie about single mother who has just been fired from her job. She heads  to her parents house to spend Thanksgiving, while her teenage daughter stays home with her boyfriend. The parents are a little whack, there's a loony aunt and plenty of family drama at the Thanksgiving table.

2020

Starring: Malin Akerman, Kat Dennings, Aisha Tyler, Jack Donnelly, Deon Cole, Jane Seymour, Chelsea Peretti, Ryan Hansen, Christine Taylor

All the dysfunctional family vibes in this ensemble comedy Thanksgiving gem about 2 lifelong friends and their holiday plans to drown their sorrows in pie, together. But with long list unwanted guests arriving, it turns into much more.

1987

Starring: Steve Martin, John Candy, Laila Robins, Michael McKean

This is the story of uptight marketing exec, Neal, and Del,  who is a sweet natured but annoying shower curtain ring salesman. They end up becoming travel partners, when their flight is diverted. The next three days have the two recent strangers traversing their way through mayhem and mishaps to get to Neal's house in time for Thanksgiving.

2019

Starring: Daniel Craig, Christopher Plummer, Chris Evans, Michael Shannon, Jamie Lee Curtis, Toni Collette and Don Johnson

According to MovieWeb, the film, although not specifically a Thanksgiving movie, has all the dysfunctional family and fall vibes. They said: "Not many films really embrace the fall aesthetic as thoroughly as Knives Out does. While the script doesn’t call specific attention to it very often, there’s no arguing that the seasonal weather does a lot to add to the overall atmosphere of the film. This weather, in combination with all the aforementioned family antics and the fact that the film was literally released over the Thanksgiving weekend in 2019, results in Knives Out inarguably being a Thanksgiving movie, despite it never actually referencing the holiday." And hey, lots of knives are up all over America this holiday, preparing to carve the turkey. 

2003

Starring: Katie Holmes, Patricia Clarkson, Oliver Platt, Derek Luke

Pieces of April  is a touching holiday treat with some impressive performances and an endearing story. Katie Holmes stars as the estranged oldest daughter of a Patricia Clarkson's character. The broken family comes together for Thanksgiving in Holmes' tiny New York apartment. She wants to reconcile with her mom who is dying from terminal breast cancer.

1983

Starring:  Tom Berenger, Glenn Close, Jeff Goldblum, William Hurt, Kevin Kline, Mary Kay Place, Meg Tilly, and JoBeth Williams

15 years after  their University of Michigan graduation, a group of friends reunite, following the death of their friend Alex, by suicide. Doesn't sound like a warm, fuzzy holiday film, right? But the friends reminisce, reveal and reflect much together. It does include an iconic Thanksgiving feast scene, a game of football in the yard, and a fantastic Motown inspired soundtrack.